October 7th, 2004
Gone
And with that, I'm out. Enjoy your weekend when it arrives.
Posted by fad at 9:59am
Mr. Tambourine Man!
World, rejoice! For Shatner has a new album, and all is once again right.
Posted by fad at 9:44am
Should Be A Sport
So why am I typing into this idiot thing when I'm not even packed? Why, because everyone knows that packing isn't any fun unless it's at the very last minute! How else am I supposed to get the joy of landing 1,800 miles away only to realize that in my rush I packed 8 shirts, no underwear and a bunch of oatbran for some reason?
Posted by fad at 8:17am
I Should Be Packing
I've wanted to move from St. Louis since, well, pretty much as soon as I moved here. There are many reasons I haven't. Fear. Self-hatred. Various other circumstances. But the real reason is that my lifetime goal is to be a fortune teller at flea markets in Queensland, Australia. Unfortunately, it's illegal.The laws, which technically still apply in Queensland, deem it to be illegal to "walk outside the home at night wearing felt or other slippers," to "pretend to tell fortunes" at flea markets or to be found in a stable or coach house with "a dark lantern, electric torch or silent matches." Offenders can get six months.I ain't doing no six months in no upside-down Australian jail! But hope is on the way.
A bizarre set of laws dating to 12th century England, which ban the wearing of slippers outdoors and fortune-telling in flea markets, is to be scrapped by an Australian state in a belated recognition of their obsolescence.My collection of puffy shirts will not just be wasted on karaoke anymore.
Posted by fad at 8:04am
October 6th, 2004
A Notification Of Information Pertaining To This Webbe Syte
(I set this so it'll be the top post. Well, until the page goes blank.)I will be out of town tomorrow through Sunday. Don't expect anything here those days as during this time I will likely have no internet access. Which shouldn't be too bad. Gotta give the internet some time to generate some new porn for me.
Posted by fad at 11:37pm
Random Complaint
I really do appreciate that someone has taken the time and effort to translate a book from Russian into English, but couldn't they also have been bothered to translate all the French phrases that get peppered about? I'm far too dense for languages -- hell, I'm barely literate in English -- so hate feeling like I'm missing out on something that's there.Then again, I probably wouldn't understand what was meant even if it were in English.
Posted by fad at 4:36pm
The Search Continues
I was just thinking about this the other day.No clues to the fate of missing Navy pilot Capt. Michael Scott Speicher have surfaced since a U.S. search team left Iraq in May, a senior U.S. officer said Wednesday.Damn. I was really hoping that, at least, was going to be settled quickly.
Posted by fad at 4:02pm
Threads
In a followup to this story, the stolen George Harrison items have been found.Little Rock, Ark., police recovered a suitcase filled with George Harrison photographs that had been stolen from the ex-Beatle's sister.Bonus is a picture of near-tears-Rumsfeld accompanying the story.
Ok, I think those two posts make up about as much as I can manage to give a damn about anything Beatles for a year.
Posted by fad at 3:23pm
Successful Ad
I have to admit, I've been unsure exactly how I was going to vote this November, but no longer.The 29-year-old mother of four offered up on e-Bay her shaved head for an anti-Bush message. Now she's sporting a tattoo of a large W - complete with a cowboy hat - with a red slash across it.No, that's not what convinced me.
The winning bid was $103.50.
Fowler says she gave half the money to the tattoo artist and used the rest to buy beer, pay part of a bill and buy a gift for her children.Notice the priority there right after paying for the tattoo. Now that's America being America!
Posted by fad at 1:46pm
Jingus
Dirt digging yields stuff.Archaeologists have unearthed the site of Genghis Khan's palace and believe the long-sought grave of the 13th century Mongolian warrior is somewhere nearby, the head of the excavation team said Wednesday.Why has it been difficult to locate until now?
According to legend, in order to keep it secret, his huge burial party killed anyone who saw them en route to it; then servants and soldiers who attended the funeral were massacred.No word on whether or not any of John Kerry's band of brothers were involved in that.
Posted by fad at 1:39pm
My Bitching Makes Me Better Than Everyone Else
I'm not going to see that movie "Taxi" (nor develop a consistent style-sheet around here about whether movie titles are in quotes or italicized) because, well, it looks really, really bad. But the commercials have given me enough to let me bitch about two things I'm sick of seeing in movies.1) The kick the door open only to have it slam right back into your face gag. This is so old that even a joke that Anna Nicole Smith would marry it because of its age is younger.
2) The black character teaching the white or Asian character (who is always uptight) how to loosen up. Usually through the magic of a song.
Though, since these two keep showing up in movies, maybe I should work them into my script so I can guarantee it will be bought. However, I'm not sure exactly how to work those into a nightmarish tale of 12th Century rutabaga farmers in Cornwall.
Posted by fad at 1:10pm
Toe Out Of Step
Sometimes it seems that nobody knows how to tone-deaflessly feed a troll like Republicans Party officials.Republicans are calling for film-maker Michael Moore to be prosecuted for offering prizes of noodles and underwear to encourage voting.Way to give Moore more than he could have hoped for out of that stunt and live up to his stereotype that you're just a bunch of uptighty whities.
The Michigan Republican Party accuses the director of bribery on his speaking tour to encourage students to vote.
[...]
"We want everyone to participate in this year's election, but not because they were bribed or coerced by the likes of Michael Moore," said Greg McNeilly, executive director of the state's Republican Party.
Posted by fad at 12:33pm
Next Time Use The Internet
Just in time for lunch comes this story.A German man got more excitement than he bargained for in a sex shop when he dozed off in a video booth, got locked in overnight and was mistaken for a burglar by police as he tried to get out, authorities said on Tuesday.I hate it when that happens to me. That's why I had a key made.
"The officers initially thought he was a burglar," the spokesman said. "But he managed to provide them with proof that he was telling the truth."I, for one, am glad they left out the details as to what this "proof" was.
Posted by fad at 11:56am
Oh Yeah
And sorry about the comments thing. I was messing with the database and screwed that up. Finally got the will together just now to fix it.
Posted by fad at 11:40am
October 5th, 2004
Farewell
Rodney Dangerfield has died at 82.
Posted by fad at 7:28pm
!=
Yeah, and I'm the new Dostoesvky."I am ready to be Nelson Mandela," Arafat said in an apparent reference to Mandela's withdrawal from political office. "I agree, but (only) after the Palestinian state is established and I am its president. Then I leave it to others."Uh huh. Boy, he sure loves his people and has total control of his ego. His grasp on reality would surely score no lower than Hot Tamale on your average love tester.
Posted by fad at 6:07pm
Seems I Have To Type This Every Couple Months
I hate computers.
Posted by fad at 5:50pm
Or Some Other Really Loaded Thing
A man is being investigated for campaign violations. That is the news portion of the story. Here's the opening paragraph of the AP report.The Republican-run Justice Department is setting its sights on Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton's 2000 Senate campaign in pursuit of possible fund-raising violations. In targeting a rising star in the Democratic Party, prosecutors are trying to gain the cooperation of an indicted businessman who raised the allegations, interviews and documents indicate.With that phrasing, can there be any doubt at all that this is a politically motivated, unsubstantiated hit job on Senator Clinton? Hell, it might be, but I don't think it's the job of the news services to frame things that way. I'm an absolute idiot who can barely process a thought, and I still think I could, if that were the case, figure that out just from the facts. The language up there is so loaded it would pop a .537 on a breathalizer.
Posted by fad at 2:27pm
I Don't Know Enough Beatles Stuff For A Good Joke
Note to Beatles' fans, there's some George Harrison stuff on the loose.Pictures of former Beatle George Harrison were taken from his sister's car while she was donating memorabilia to the Clinton Presidential Library, she said Monday.Check your local black market. But the real reason I linked this story was for this quote.
'I feel that really, Clinton is the Beatle president,'' she said.Well, OK then. At least he isn't the Mentors president. Though if he'd been the G.W.A.R. president, that would have been, well, interesting at the very least.
Posted by fad at 1:10pm
Take Back The Night And 7.35% Of Income
And while we're at it, since every man is a potential rapist, all of us should have to spend some time in jail and be required to do community service for it.A group of Swedish parliamentarians proposed levying a "man tax" to cover the social cost of violence against women.Obviously this is just a headline getting proposal -- though, since it is Sweden, maybe not -- but it sure reflects a lot of thinking. Especially thinking I remember from college.
"It must be obvious to all of us that society has a huge problem with male violence against women and that has a cost," Left Party deputy Gudrun Schyman told Swedish radio on Monday.
"We must have a discussion where men understand they as a group have a responsibility," said Schyman, one of the party members to sign the motion for debate on the new tax.
I tell this story all the time, so why not once more. My first year of college at University of Wisconsin - Whitewater, I was waiting in line at the library staring absently at the various bookmarks (usually just construction paper cutouts). One had that headline "Every Man Is A Potential Rapist" along with an ink drawing of some generic, surly fellow. Well, actually, not all that generic. It was a dead ringer for me. Sadly, I lost the one I took a couple moves ago.
Posted by fad at 12:28pm
A Posting
Huh. Lookit that. No posts yet today. Shame on me. Well, since I'll be gone at the end of the week, this aggression can not stand! But, unfortunately, I'm feeling very stupid today and am not up to the frustration of trying to prove myself wrong. So, just to be stupid, and because I made the mistake of letting popular music play over the radio yesterday letting this get stuck in my head, I would like to present the dumbest opening lyrics to a song "Heard Just In The Last Day" category:"Life is a waterfall.
We're one in the river
and one again after the fall."
Second place:
"Stars will cry!"
I have no idea if there are any words after that as that covers the longest it's ever taken me to turn off the radio. Basically, if anything non-human is crying -- like some song a few years ago that had crying dolphins -- in your song (with the exception of maybe Jimmy Carter), that's a sure sign it's time to turn the dial. Even NPR is better than that.
Gee, aren't you glad you stopped by?
Posted by fad at 12:17pm
October 4th, 2004
Coffee
I have to say, this sounds unpleasant.Battling distillers for the young adult drinker, Anheuser-Busch Cos. has sent the Budweiser brand into the fray. The St. Louis brewer will roll out this year a new Budweiser product called "B-to-the-E", a beer infused with caffeine, guarana, and ginseng.Nothing like the combination of caffeine and higher alcohol contents to help increase sales. And nothing like a really stupid name to hurt them.
[...]
The beer will be brewed in Houston and packaged in a slim 10-ounce can, the brewer announced Monday. It will contain 6.6 percent alcohol by volume.
Posted by fad at 5:25pm
Tried Three Times For a Title and Gave Up
The concept of property is a difficult one.Authorities say Lindsay rented out at least three apartments in buildings she didn't own, and signed a contract to sell a vacant six-flat she didn't own to a customer for 40 thousand dollars. She reportedly accepted a ten-thousand-dollar check for down payment on that property.Hmmm, why would she do such a thing?
Police detectives said that when they questioned Lindsay, she told them that her lifelong dream has been to be a landlord, and that she thought she would be a good one.It's always nice to see someone living their dream.
Posted by fad at 4:00pm
Your Hand Is Held
Here are your tax dollars at work."For the vast majority of American households, digital television may be uncharted territory," said Federal Communications Commission chairman Michael Powell. "We will not let them go it alone."*Sniff*....I love my leaders because they love me. What a dear moment this is for me. Tune in to Monday Night Football tonight to bask in the beaming presence of chairman Powell and feel the love.
Posted by fad at 3:48pm
I'm Important. I Get Calls
Oh boy. Nothing beats close quarters and phone calls.In recent tests airplane maker Airbus and American Airlines teamed up with telecommunications firms to show that using mobile phones in-flight can work.But how will assholes get to show everyone how important they are without having to be told 7 times to shut off their phone? Without a paradiggum to rebel against, they will be stuck finding new ways to establish their dominance over the cabin.
"It sounded just as if I was on the ground talking to someone next door," said one passenger who used a mobile phone in-flight.
But on that use of the cell phone conversation to try to impress and/or establish domination ("I'm so important I need to annoy you. Just listen to the content of my call as I name big companies, money values and foreign cities!"), my favorite recent example was during my last trip to LA. Some dude, who apparently thought he was in the movie Swingers, was talking very loudly into his phone as we all waited around the baggage carousel. He made sure we understood that he was a record producer and that the tracks were "money, baby, money." I just had to laugh at him.
Posted by fad at 2:43pm
Databases Rock
Wow. This is impressive.Civil War buffs, historians and people adding branches to their family trees can now go to a single source to find service records of 6.3 million Union and Confederate soldiers.It's not perfect, and there are still some thousands left to be added, but what a tremendous resource. The site is at http://www.civilwar.nps.gov.
[...]
Historians generally accept 3.5 million as the number who served in the War Between the States. Why does the database contain 6.3 million soldiers?
"There are duplicates, mostly because of men who served in more than one unit and name-spelling variations,"
Posted by fad at 1:18pm
Bam
Crimeny, can this fad of sending powder in letters finally stop?A receptionist at the Plain Dealer opened up the legal-sized envelope Saturday afternoon. It contained powder and a three-page, typewritten letter, assistant managing editor Chris Jindra said.The powder turned out to be just "onion salt and other seasonings".
''It claimed that Bush was poisoning America,'' she said. ''It did not contain threats. It just went on and on about Bush's policies. It also said it contained snail poison.''
Look, if you feel a manifesto just burning up your insides and getting the voices in your head all agitated, just get yourself a goddamn blog.
Posted by fad at 1:14pm
Burns When He Pees
Stage antics are stage antics, but I do have to question the order of events here.[T]he lead guitarist set his thong on fire, then removed it and scurried around the stage naked.He set it on fire then removed it?
Posted by fad at 11:41am
Random Statement To The World
You know, I don't care how blue you paint your face, or how many props you bring, or how much weird music and lighting you use, you're still a fucking mime.
Posted by fad at 11:27am
Right To Speech Determined By Local Economy
The Supreme Court is determined to solidify caps on political donations.The court, without comment, let stand a 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals decision that the caps on contributions by individuals and political action committees were justified to prevent even the appearance of corruption in the state political process.Does this mean that there will be limits to the limits that can be set in markets like Chicago, LA and New York? Nothing like complication to make it all better.
[...]
Montana provided enough evidence to support its claim that it was seeking to combat corruption and that candidates weren't unduly harmed since it is relatively inexpensive to mount a political campaign there, the circuit court said.
Posted by fad at 10:34am
Frontier
Just watched SpaceShipOne's X-prize flight. A little wing wobble, but so far it looks to be a beautiful flight. They burned the engine nearly 10 seconds longer than the last flight, apparently going for the X-15's record. Now it's in the final glide down which is supposed to be a little more than 10 minutes from now. It's not official yet, but hot damn.UPDATE: Unofficially it's 368,000 feet which beats the X-15's 357,000.
UPDATE: The X-Prize people are announcing today the X-Prize Cup, which involves all participants coming to New Mexico for a week or two to compete in altitude contests, time to climb and those sorts of things. It will be dangerous; it will be exciting.
So now, who will be the first either columnist or paper to write the big editorial decrying the money spent on this instead of some social program? The Guardian always has a good shot at this stuff.
UPDATE: He's landed completely safely. Supposedly onboard were some toys they plan to auction off for charity (as well as some stuff for those who ponied up the dough). At least that's what is being reported.
Posted by fad at 10:00am
Yes, That Is My Christmas Stocking
I'm no Hello Kitty hater, but, as in all things, sometimes it can be taken too far.
Posted by fad at 6:33am
Chocolate Sauce
Janet Leigh has died. I can't decide if I should take a shower in her honor, or visit some of my peepin' holes. Someday, when America is America again, I will be able to do both.
Posted by fad at 6:19am
Speaking of Summits
I can just imagine how those would go:| US | OK, Mr. Terrorist, let's get these negotiations started. We're willing to withdraw from Iraq. What will you give us in return? |
| Terrorist | You are all pigs and dogs! You will be slaughtered! |
| US | Ok....um, How about some more aid to help with the poverty, the root cause of your anger, as well as a withdrawal? |
| Terrorist | The infidels must withdraw from all Muslim lands! |
| US | Ok, if it means peace. We will withdraw back to our nations and leave you alone. |
| Terrorist | All lands are Muslim lands! |
| US | Righhht....well, we could always launch ourselves into space. It'd be like Battlestar Gallactica or Robotech. |
| Terrorist | We will not let you poison the heavens with your infidel pig-dog hides! |
| US | Couldn't we just take some Pershings out of Turkey or something? |
Posted by fad at 6:05am
I'm What's Wrong With America
So now we're supposed to parse frame-by-frame debates and appearances for hopes of finding something, anything to dig on the other guy. You'll forgive me if I don't really care if Kerry brought out a crib sheet -- probably written in French -- at the debate. Hell, it might have just been a shred of his magic, CIA hat for all we know right now.I admit this is colored by the fact that the debates mean nothing to me. A candidate's performance in one of these things has absolutely no bearing on my desire to vote for or against them. Unless of course they start chanting, "kee! kee! nagalootcha!" for some reason. Yes, yes. Small details like perhaps feeling the need to "cheat" in a debate can paint a man's character like dots in a Seurat painting (woo! can I write more ridiculous than that? Stay tuned and find out!). And I know that many do settle their vote based on these stupid talking contests so I should be more concerned that everything is on the absolute up and up, but, well, I just can't get exercised about this.
If Kerry must be dinged, I'd prefer to observe that during his time in the Senate he was against fighting the Cold War in the manner it was being fought. Now, faced with a very different war, he still wants to fight it the same way he did then. With winking containment, occasional appeasement if it keeps it over there, and summits, summits, summits.
And, yes, by not condemning Kerry for what appears to be a huge nothing, this does mean that I want democracy destroyed, the terrorists to win, all aspects of society nationalized and daily, public abortions performed by gay priests on the altars of all churches while I piss pure lube on the slippery slope with a smile and a wave.
UPDATE: Supposedly 'twas a pen. Though it was a black. You know, like the UN helicopters. I need say no more.
Posted by fad at 6:02am
October 3rd, 2004
Uptime
Well, after rebuilding servers and other fun things, we discovered it was really the router taking a magical and clever dump all over itself. That appears to have been taken care of, the changes made to servers appear to mostly be working (fixing what ain't really broke always leaves some surprises), so hopefully things will be steady around here for a while.
Posted by fad at 10:14am